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Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.(This one got extra credit.)11. Karmageddon: It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer.12. Decafalon (n): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.13. Glibido: All talk and no action.14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating.The Washington Post has also. He came and stood in front of her. Lifted the belt from her hands and flexed it in front of her a few times, looking into her eyes the entire time. Then he took her hands and slowly extended her arms to their full length, Susan’s aching shoulder-joints screaming with relief at finally being allowed to stretch.He drew her downwards, folding her arms on the floor and placing her forehead on top of them. Susan, now unable to see, heard him step softly behind her. Felt his hands grasping her hips, urging them high into the air?the warmth of his palms caressing her behind, as if testing the texture?a fingertip drawn lightly between her legs, making her gasp?the sound of his belt being lightly slapped against the palm of his hand?Oh, thank God, thought Susan, trying to restrain herself from wiggling her behind at him, certain he could see how wet she was.Then: the sound of his footsteps, moving away. A chair being pulled out. A knife and fork against a plate?And the sound of her own.
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